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Thomas Crooks, The Trump Shooter, Is A Nigerian!

  Thomas Crooks Thomas Crooks was just an ordinary guy until he listened to his overtaxed brain.  Brain: Do you know you can be famous? Crooks: How? Brain: By attempting the infamous!  So, Crooks picked his father’s AR-15-style semiautomatic rifle. He listened to his confused brain again and headed to a rally nearby. Minutes later, he did a crooked thing by firing at Donald Trump!  Crooks wasn't a known professional crook. But he obviously had a enough crooked mind to store explosives in his car and home.  Yes, the Trump shooter was one man. But his name, “Crooks,” gave the impression of a multiple negative character. His crooked act and plans probably justified the addition of letter “s” to a his name, making him one but many crooks! Crooks’  “crooked shot missed Trump by an inch. Thomas Crooks was probably so crooked that he couldn't think straight. But thank God he couldn't shoot straight, either. Otherwise, the world would have missed a daring, straight...

Agbani Boy’s Philosophy

 


 

At the peak of his “godfather crisis”, Governor Chimaroke Nnamani walked up to me and asked: “Usoro, do you have e-mail address?”  It was at a dinner he organised in Lagos for editors. I almost asked: “what the hell does that mean?”  But courage failed me. Colleagues around eyed me suspiciously. They probably found the question funny. Or thought I had done something wrong. Or that the “Agbani boy” was going to send me a secret mail. But like they sometimes end questions in schools, it was “none of the above.”

 

I edited the Sunday Post Express, then. And I was sure the gov wasn’t interested in the state of my paper. Certainly, he wasn’t going to send me money through e-mail – even if it was possible. I said, “Yes, sir!” And the guy simply walked over without asking what the email address was.

 

It was supposed to be a happy time for him, but it wasn’t. Nnamani was pissed with his godfather, Jim Nwobodo. Enugu became so hot. The latter ran to Abuja and the former had a brain wave. He ran to the press. That was some time, last year.

 

Nnamani’s question was not about me. It was about PR. It was about his philosophy. By then, his status as an intellectual-governor was rising. Yet, it was clear he was trying to be friendly with mortals like me. The “e-mail question” was just his simple way of interaction. Since then, the man hasn’t forgotten my name. He even remembered my wedding and approved N25, 000 for me, although the money got trapped in bureaucracy. 

 

From the “e-question”, the Agbani boy’s philosophy was apparent. The “cell-to-cell communication” medical doctor, like Socrates, just loves interaction. Such minor contacts probably help him define what someone called his “cerebral approach to governance”. Already, in his attempt at “mass mobilisation” and “critical consciousness,” his planks of philosophy, Nnamani has lectured round the nation.

 

Usually, the main theme of his lectures always revolves round patriotism, true federalism and democracy dividends. Between January 2001 and now, he has delivered about 23 Lectures. At Chief Bola Ige’s September 30 posthumous birthday lecture, Nnamani argued against giving national issues ethnic colouration. He said the June 12, 1993 struggle revealed the cohesion of Nigeria, “both in the social realm and political awareness”. The elite, he added, with all their pretensions, were exposed and “had to come to terms with the brilliance of the down-trodden, who, ordinarily were assumed to be headless and unreasonable.”

 

The governor seems always on the side of the masses. He insists, always, that the dividend of democracy the people expect is in the shape of amalaakpu and tuwo. In other words, the true dividend should meet the immediate necessities of life. That is why Nnamani says his area of interest in governance, is poverty alleviation. However, whether words, like Chaucer cautioned, is indeed a good cousin to the deeds in Enugu, is a matter for another day.

 

The Agbani boy is critical of “circumstantial leaders”, who pretend to be representing their people, while awaiting any political appointment. And when the people go back to their ethnic trenches, Nnamani doesn’t vilify them. Rather, he shows understanding that the people have lost faith in the national leadership. The rise of ethnic militia; the recurring clashes, he argues, have their bases on the disappointments of the citizenry. 

 

The many years of military rule didn't help matters either. Hence, rather than imbibe the values of democracy quickly, the citizens retained a large vestige of combativeness. "Even we in government have retained that combativeness”. The solution, he added, is a total refocusing of the national consciousness; a complete reorientation of both the leaders and the led. The solution to the national question of exclusivity is the opposite. "In a state such as Nigerian where it is largely held that there is yet to be a crystallization of national identity, the practice in inclusion of the will of the people, may go a long way in building a political society devoid of fear of ethnic domination, an uncaring state, coercive hostile forces and violent drive at power rather than appeal to people's emotions", says Nnamani.

 

Nnamani's assumed role of waking the nation to its reality can be encapsulated in the succinct words of a sage: “You shall not get to Mecca, oh Nomad; the road you have taken leads to Turkistan”.  Put differently, the way Nigerian leaders have carried on so far, creates a vacuum between the expectation and the delivery of the dividends. Nnamani calls it “wrong expectation framework”.

 

With Nnamani’s philosophy goes a tradition.  At every lecture, he spots a white shirt and a wine-coloured tie. The jacket always goes off. Intermittently, he raises hand like a Pentecostal pastor. The hand that goes up usually, to emphasise a point, is the left. Then, the lecturer, in a deliberate measure of words, argues in a didactic way of the ancient philosophers.  When Nnamani finds time to come up with incredible academic materials is surprising. But so far, he has confounded even the university dons with his depth and bold pronouncements. 

 

When he became a lecturer is not much of a problem as why. However, the question many have asked often is the relevance of his lectures. "Is that a dividend of democracy, too?" somebody asked. Nnamani’s apparent answer, at UNILAG, last year, was a complete indictment on the political elite, who are most times selfish in their decisions. His "critical consciousness," therefore, appears an attempt to right the wrongs of a nation, through its leaders. 

 

True, Nnamani's lectures are not the expected "bread and butter" democracy dividends. It is also true that the masses hardly have a voice in decision making. But if their representatives are well enlightened; politically focused; socially conscious and often alive to their responsibilities, then the democracy dividends could be made more visible.

 

Some months earlier, he had insisted at Jos that "the plurality of Nigeria and the vigour of varying tendencies compel that we cease reducing Nigeria to just our perspective, no matter how sophisticated, how urbane and how vast in knowledge we think we are." The needs for Nigerians to recognise what the existentialists call "the other” has been the foundation of Nnamani's arguments, wherever he lectures. And if his attempts at critical consciousness impact on the leaders to eventually produce the much-awaited democracy dividends, everyone would join Nnamani to say: To God be the glory!

 

  • First published in Saturday Sun of  October 11, 2003

 

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