Death On My Mind

  

 

After Obasanjo’s “bitter pills", I thought nothing could shake me. But penultimate week, I was jolted by news of another kind of "deregulation". News of sudden deaths that left many casualties. They came in quick succession, leaving my mind in a whirl. And my shoulders heavy.

 

First, I lost a brother-in-law to the faceless force. Emmanuel Akpan, a gentle, kind and sociable soul, left my sister with two kids. My colleague at the Daily Times, Aliyu Mashud, was also "deregulated". He too left a young wife and two kids. Back home, a family friend lost a son. The young man was my junior in secondary school. Again, a wife and a kid were left to suffer. A young lawyer, who handled cases for my indigent family members, also died. He was reportedly so kind that he did some of their suits free.

 

True, Martin Heidegger, a German existentialist, had warned that "as soon as man is born, he is old enough to die". But that man is “a being-unto-death” does not prepare the loved ones for the shock of eternal dislocation. We all know, like my friend, Dr Friday Ndubuisi of UNILAG would explain, that death could come at one's prime, in youth or in old age. But certain factors make the severance unbearable. All the men mentioned held out promises. They were such nice - humble, courteous and amiable - persons that their death touched the marrow. Suddenly, their wives, including my kid sister, have joined the widows' club. 

 

When a loved one dies, all sorts of philosophies emerge - all in attempt to console. Some say like Menander that "whom the gods love dies young". But I disagree. What kind of god would love a man so much to cut him from his budding family? Why love one and hate many others? What crime did my sister and the kids, for instance, commit that the "gods" should treat them with resentment? Camus had denounced a "creation in which children are tortured". He couldn't stomach a world where innocent souls suffered illnesses and other evils. When a father dies, the children suffer. The wife is ridiculed. Once you cut the head, the body withers, abi? If that is love from a god, I reject it, in the name of all that is good. I refuse a love that cuts a man, the live-wire, from his kids and wife. Amen! I know what it means to lose a dad at a tender age. I was there, once. And wouldn't pray it upon even a man who has the guts to steal my wife.

 

Death, as Scott Rogo and Raymond Bayless said in their work, "Phone Calls From The Death", has become a subject of ever-increasing importance to the public. It occupies everybody's mind, though in different ways. Particularly, in a society like ours, with no social amenities. Where people (like Mashud) die without receiving their salaries and entitlements.  Hence, many are forced into crime, corruption, etc., all in attempt "to leave something" for the family. Unfortunately, my in-law and my friends left no estate.

  

Death is the limit of all things. It's the end of plans, friendship, fatherhood, relationship, etc. It's the end of the beginning. Pre-determinists say its timing is carved on stone. It has been destined from creation. Once it's your time, no shifting. Even a drunk, trying to console me, said: "You can miss the call but not the time." But all that collapses on analysis. For, it portrays God as uncaring, insensitive, partial, etc. It paints God as the ultimate dictator, out on ego trip. Creating people with different life spans. For what?  To ignite emotional pain, agony, suffering and frustration at the demise of a loved one? Why would a loving Being allow people to bring forth innocent kids and leave them in the middle of nowhere? Now, what did the ones predestined to die young do to deserve such? Does God love some more than others? Are we not told the Supreme Force is all loving, all caring and treats everyone equally? Then, why do some die young? 

 

A school of thought says the good ones die young because God does not want them contaminated by evil. Really? Couldn’t God then keep them from wrong? Can't He control evil? Maybe, maybe not. But how come we have godly old people? If that argument follows, God should have killed them the moment they became "born again". Are we then to believe that God is using us all as pawns in a power contest with the negative force? That, again, would be very insensitive - to create innocent beings for a power show.

 

Issues about death are as academic as questions about God. But the reality is that death is everywhere. Road, house, office, etc. Everywhere! It's on my mind. It's on yours, too. Because nobody wants to lose a dear one. None wants to die, not even the saintly and aged ones like the Pope. Our politicians steal the national coffers, but would readily give it to armed robbers to spare their lives. Reason? Fear of the unknown. That’s why Donald Etiebet and Chris Ngige keep alleging threats to their lives. 

 

Everyone fears the unknown. An old woman once prayed for death. She was so old that life was a discomfort. But then, in the night, a rat fell on mama in the dark room. She shrieked: "Somebody help me-o! I am dying. Somebody is trying to kill me".

 

Some fear for those left behind. Some may not care to die, but the circumstance matters to them. Adams Oshiomhole, the NLC president, was ready to die during the fuel price strike. But he raised alarm last week that the FG was out to kill him - to pave way for deregulation and tame labour. Was he afraid to die? I'm not sure. But if Oshiomhole is eventually killed, police investigation may last for life. It happened to Dele Giwa, Alfred Rewane, Harry Marshal, Bola Ige, among many others. We're then forced to fall back on the scriptural curse on those through whose hands our death comes.

 

To reflect on death is different from being afraid of it. Many may not be scared of its coming, but worried about the timing. And, troubled for the living. But even the mere mention of it frightens the feeble mind. Yet, like my people say, shouting 'God forbid!' does stop a child from dying. True, God can. But would He?  So far, for whatever reason, He's allowed death of young people all over the place. Maybe, He's doing his own deregulation with us, the mortals. Hence, He allows Baba Iyabo to finish us off. Perhaps, fatalists would say it was our "time", so God allowed INEC to "vote in" Obasanjo to deregulate our stomachs and hasten our death. 

 

• First published in Saturday Sun of  Nov 22, 2003